Hi (:
My name is Chair and I rock.
Seventeen candles on the 28th September '09. I ♥ cocktails, cocaine, and clubbing.

PARAMORE
is the bomb.
you know you love me
xoxo


put a more detailed profile here. (:




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photos! at 9:43 PM


sese at michelle house ! :]

AT KBOX!connie !

daddy and ziyi singing. lalala~
haha sy i told you i will put ! =p

xin :]
michelle !i took it while daddy singing, he did not pose it hor !
ziyi,daddy,apple,sweeyee,xin,connie,mich and me. :Djas ! :]sweeyee !:]

daddy ! like daddy, like daughter. :]actually we drank more than that, plus 2 spilled 1 broke.somemore all ice lemon tea. ==random~!com'on jas! sing man. :Dblurish but its nice. :]sese again but dao MIA !!sing sang sung !my girls :]
two daughters against one daddy. :D

after much consideration, i decided not to post chingay photos, one reason is too many and another is my blog will lag out ! oh by the way, get back all my common test result except for english.
emaths-25/40
chem-33/50
phy-28/50
hmms, i think i still can do better. will mug harder for next test. :]


chingay kum kbox !~ at 11:21 PM

sunday
woke up by daddy msg, told me he will be late, like ytd i thought he willl be pretty late so i drag my time and guess what? i was late by 30 mins again, haha daddy also nag at me. =p he wear until so formal ! hahas then went with him to michelle house. ate at michelle house, as usual, her mum's cooking is nice ! hahas then finally sese able to take photo again so took some photos after that went kbox with daddy,apple,michelle,xin,sweeyee,connie,jas and ziyi. we was like sometimes high, sometimes down larx. we can high until we spilled two drinks and broke one cup ! and when we are down, we can down until like very quiet except for those singing. then daddy and xin ps us ! they went pooling just because they are 16 ! herz but they came back around 5+ and jas leave half way due to some problem with the who larx. then we almost sing for 4hrs++ then drank 2 cups of ice lemon teas each, anyway its free what. hahas leave the place at around 6+, went hgm foodcourt, have our dinner then sat there chat and play true or dare. i know its lame but we sure have lots of fun and know quite alot of secrets ! hahas after that, went acarde, played daytona, ddr and parapara. idiot siax, the machine i chose for daytona, the steering wheel spoilt larx ! wth i was like !@#$&, anyway i got last larx. after that we played parapara, i passed the first round then when daddy took over, he failed it ! haha then
played ddr with ziyi and daddy. ziyi and daddy is take turn larx, then i chose those four stars or 5 one then ziyi dance until like .. hahas when daddy played, he himself chose 3 stars only. haha not fair to ziyi then ziyi want to revenge so after we finished, he run up then chose 6 stars one ! i was like hell, die liao, then i try to save the game then daddy said arghh don want play, give up! idiot then of course we lost. or else can pass one lehx ! then played parapara again, daddy went to chose hard mode, so first round we lost, like wasted our money then we played again, this time normal mode, again like what i mention, daddy lost at the second round again. haha :DD after that connie want go to the fun fair see, was thinking to go in and play but they said too late already cause the time already 9+ so decided maybe coming to play on my birthday ! haha 10th march which is one more week ! haha after that took 161 back with daddy, chatted then i told him i wanted to cab home cause already 10+ plus, he was thinking to send me home but i keep telling him i want take cab home, so he accompany waiting for the cab then later awhile i board the cab and reached home around 10+. its like these few days, have been cabbing home, and kbox allthose, use alot money siax. but i still haven use my hongbao money. hoho planning to keep in the bank. :D anyways, i know its a long post in one entry but no choice i got lots to say. hahas photos most probably will be upload tmr because i haven sent it to my other com which have my photoshop as i need to edit some of the photos before posting. anyway dear xin arx, don't sound so sad already you're not yourself. i want the old xin okay? you will still get the chance to go out with us de, don't make it like no chance already and i want you to come and celebrate with me on my birthday. :] for now, i'm not gonna to bother with other things, its so irritating, i would rather let them talk about me but i would still continue with my life at least i still have my bunch of great fwen with me. its 1am now, going to sleep or else tml can't concentrate during the class. =x
saturday
well, went out with connie. met her at 5 however i let her waited for 30 mins because before that she told me, she still at tm when the time is already 4.40++ so i thought she won't be that fast and i slowly take my time who knows i msg her at 4.56 and she told me her bus already at punngol? i was like shit? shower and rush out, of course she nag at me for letting her to wait. anyway we went orchard because we going to watch the chingay but before that we had our dinner at sushi tei ! yipee she treat me ! ahaas because she lost me a bet. :] actually we was thinking not to go because connie's sis called and told her that we need to sit on the road for don't know what reason, however after much thinking, we decided to try our luck to see whether our ticket issit for vip seat. after we finish our dinner, went there and the person told me that we need to walk down abit which mean we are not the vip seat, then after that walk down again found another ticket entrance then they told me to walk to the junction there and then i realise our ticket state "half lane entry" was like == okays .. so we went in, sat on the map thats is place on the road. at first was pretty boring but after the show started, its was fun because we get to interact with the performancer. its was fun seriously ! i took lots of photos, shall upload next time. haha after that it ended at 9+ thought it still have party but we are not interested so connie wanted to go far east, and we walked there almost all the shop had closed because the time already 2158? going 10, i still don't know so decided to go home, mrt back then i suggested to connie we took the train to harbourfront so we got seat. haha then around 11+ reach sk, cab home on the way was having con about tml stuff. so reach home like going 12 and nobody home yet because they went my san yi house and dad went oversea, sianx. shower, conference, com then sleep.


cny ! at 7:21 PM

third day
hmm went my da yi house, then awhile went tp with cousins they all. because its was xuefang birthday, so bought a billabong wallet for her. :] guess what i saw riis !! hahas no larx actually is jem saw me first then he called riis to call me, then later we meet together and chatted awhile then my cousin want go liao, so have to part with besties! ): sad sad besties we will meet up other day! i still have lots to say ! hees think this year cny, come fast end fast too, alot of things happened too. but hopefully now all the misunderstanding will be clear and we will be the bestest pal, alright? :] i know now we can only be fwen, but better than nothing. :)
glvin and amanda
all kiddys
the handsome and cute brothers !
my CUTE allarick !
my handsome aloysius !

second day
went my li kim house around 3 plus because of the kbox thing. i woke up at 1plus. =p very tired mahx, then went there. also very boring, sat there watch tv, chatted with cousins. then took photos again, after that i went home first at 8plus because i want do hmwk. but ended up i din do, i was using com all the way until 2+ they come home, i then sleep. hahas =p awww ! my allarick so cute ! hahas ohya and after the two days visits, i realise all my cousins are boys ! boys ! omg, even new born baby also boy! faint siax, girl extinct liao. TT


at k !
whoops ! caught me and xuefang singing
debbie jie jie singing !
gotcha ! weijian kor kor and dongyu kor kor singing !
all my cousins !
weijian korkor,sister,dongyu korkor, me,xuefang and xueling jie jie


at ah kim houseall boys ! baby glenn, junhong,junquan and yiming.
two naughty brothers ! junhong and junquan
yiming and me !
xuefang and me

first day
went to my gramps house first awhile then went my ah kim house. do nothing slack there, talk to my kor kor and jie jie they all lorx. most importantly is to get hong bao. hahas my cousins all very guai, they don't gamble. =xx then have dinner then debbie jie jie suggested to go kbox so tag along too. 9 peoples went in and they gave us such a small room, which is so squeeze ? some more the air conditioner like spoilt, very warm even dongyu kor kor said so. sing alot, and we was like high-ing inside ? chose the song until the list full must wait, then song haven play finish eject it or don't know how to sing which we still chose but later eject too. dumb us ! but we had lots of fun then reach home around 2am, cabbed back and off to bed after shower.


new year eve~! at 10:39 PM

today was a very boring day for me because i stayed at home the whole day ! anyway can't go anywhere because all the shops either open half day or closed on today. slacked all the way till night went gramps house to had reunion dinner. i'm bloated after eating all the foods and i still love yu sheng ! for no particular reason, i love it. whoot ! yummy ! stayed there awhile then went home, put on all my new year clothing and thinking which to wear. haha and i think i would be wearing that gray dress, its look very nice. i like it so much. =p guess tomorrow gonna be a boring new year for me, cause all my cousins are either way older than me or younger than me ! i have no one to talk to. TT and worse is all my fwen went m'sia either back on wed or fri. damn and i still got lots of work haven complete yet. this isn't a pleasant new year for me. =xx although deep down in my heart, i still wish to be the special person of yours, but now all i want is to be a very best fwen of yours because now thing ain't getting better but turning bad each day. perhaps, now both of us should have a talk and get thing right instead of getting it worse and worse which i don't wish to see. and i'm feeling very frustrated by my family esp my dad and aunt. can't they just stop saying me and him? its really very irritating to hear all these teasing, please understand how i feel, do you guys really think i want that to happen? mum asking about it also, but what can i do? i'm a already feeling very vex because of this thing and school thing. all happened because of our break up, why must it make it so complicated? it's already so heartbreaking and all these fcuking stuff just keep popping in. holy shit, please i want all these to stop. if everything was my fault, say it my fault okay ? i don't want any heartbreaking stuff to keep happening, just get all the thing done and stop all these. i'm really very tired, the thought of doing "that" appear once again. i still miss you alot, do you miss me? all the msgs you wrote to me, all the promises you gave. its all the past but can i have those promises again? baby, i still love you. is it still possible to say "i love you" to you again?



fun?! at 11:40 PM

had CNY performance today, everything totally was screwed up. zheng lao shi weren't very please with our performance and wanted us to work extreme hard for our syf. debrief took a long time so missed out daddy's singing, watched the SKY dance, damn fun and nice larx. we girls were laughing and screaming like hell? was the first time we girls so high for celebration, then daddy's team won the second prize, we sese stood up and cheer for him but the sad thing is he did not saw it. == ended at 10+, stayed at school complete eng essay then wait for connie, mich they all to finish their work. then 12+, took 86 and we went seletar club in school uniform. actually only me, apple, michelle, connie and daddy then later zhoudao, janice and jasmine tag along too. its was fun, had bowling first, whoo i score the highest ! then pool with connie, today couldn't concentrate keep missed the ball. then looking at dao and janice play the pool, very funny. they so cute when playing the pool. then jas and apple played table tennis and they were like somehow turn it to badminton? then mich and daddy played table tennis too. everyone were so high, but not me. don't know why can't high even apple said today i'm extremely quiet. =xx then swopped place, played table tennis all those. seriously looking at everyone of us playing, you will laugh the hell out of yourself. pooled with daddy, he said what's the hell wrong with me, keep missing, i said i couldn't concentrate and tired then he said come here must play cannot think so much. =xx afterthat, see apple and janice eat because we are too poor to eat at the club. around 4+ left the place, took 86 to sk. then we sat at lrt there, talk talk and eat. suddenly a group of guys come, they were police. asked us what we doing here, then checked our ic, took down our address and check our bag. they most properly think we are having illegal gathering then still asked do we smoke? of course we ans loudly, we don't then still chatted with them happily after they finish the checking. hahas we are not afraid because we are guai kia. =p sat awhile then they said want go home, so walked around cp with connie then called mum, she was at hgm. anyway i also got things to buy so went there find her, bought my stuff then later went kcf buy drink, saw mengyang,ivan,shaoqi and daryl. talk to them awhile then off i go, cabbed home. damn tired, sleeping soon. tomorrow gonna rush all the work or else no time to do during cny ! all i wanted was to be a very best fwen of yours, can't i? but what exactly happened this few weeks that causes us to misunderstand each other so much. thing was going fine after the breakup but a few days later, everything started to go worse and worst. we began misunderstanding each other so much that, we could simply quarrel because of small thing. where's the bond we had last time, it's like totally ruined after all these. we seem to have no trust for each other even as a fwen. thats not what i wished to? it's really heartbreaking to see our relationship turning sour everyday, i still think that we might still be able to be together, but now, i can sense that it's impossible for now even we are fwen, still can quarrel then tell me how can we be together again? those feeling definitely will be different, i swear both of us feeling had faded alot after all these quarrellings but right now i still have feeling for you, i don't know you do but i really still have. i don't want to see us ending up become a stranger that we do not know. i hope you understand. even now we are not very good but i still miss you, i really do. i can't make myself forget you even if i wanted to, its so hard. i really miss you, i hope everything can sort out nicely and no misunderstanding so we could be the bestest fwen of all with no hatred or more? but now, i don't wish for more, just want us to be back to how we are before 240905. can we? and today i'm so quiet at the club, its because of you. those memories i had with you at there, it keep popping up in my mind and of that very sudden, i suddenly miss you alot esp miss you piggy back me. but now everything it's gonna be past. i will cherish those memories i have, i really do. what i need now is a time machine, to turn back everything.


dead at 10:30 PM

two choices, to live or to die? i rather chose to die because everything could end and stop the pain of us. the presence of me would only be a burden to you, do something to stop this pain of mine. please hate me, let me suffer so i would not think of having you back. why couldn't you just simply give me that chance? perhaps deep down you really suffered alot that i did not know but just that really can't? are we really meant to be friend after all ? if that's the case, why couldn't you end it earlier or rather not having this relationship in the first place. why made me fall for you so deep and now you just leave me so sudden, yes time is all i need but do you really think i can get over it? although we been together for only 1year 4 months, its not a very long time but in this 16 months, how many tears, joy we had shed and enjoyed. it's really hard to forget and i had tried to accept the fact but i can't. i really can't ... after all, you are the one worth lovin' but not me.



haiish at 9:27 PM

tution today, well i weren't feeling very tired and can concentrate although was quite noise because i keep talking. =s but still can finish my work, after that apple made mich cry and angry because of something. i'm not sure whether it's a prank or accidentally, i definitely think thats very overboard. went cp, looking for v day present for girls fwen they all, then saw some very nice but then i decided to went other place to see anything nicer. went kovan, found nothing nice but i bought one cute lil stuff for felicia. then later went back cp again. == at last, i still decided to buy those stuff for them. boo then went home, use com till now. =p but one thing is i've studied for my phy already. but later will recap abit in case i forget and memorise all the formulas. well common test tml and tues, gonna mug real hard after that is v day. this year would be a lonely one because i don't have anyone to spend with. ): i dream of you ytd, not only ytd, i dreamt of you alot of times. i really miss you alot but from ytd how you said, i really don't know how you feel about me. i really don't know. but i will continue to wait for you, wait for the day, the day we will be together like last time how we do. i missed those days, i really miss them. but seriously, i miss you alot ! ): one more thing, my dear doreen, don't you ever think of doing something silly hor. i will always be there for you. :]

Saturday
well, went co early in the morning but i was late for few mins anyway i think the room still haven open so not consider late. :] then ended at 11, went cp with mich and connie. lunched at pizza hut, ate till very full then walk around, see things. went home around 1 plus then rushed to shu hui house for tution. was late because of sy then had 2 hours tution, i finally understand every single things on metal. but sy looked blur. then reach home awhile, prepared then off to shopping with mummy. hoho went chinatown first, i swear i won't go that place esp new year period. its like you can't walk or stop to see things, people just keep squeezing and squeezing, its like so irritated? so we decided to go bugis. oh well, thats place isn't better anyway just that not that much people than chinatown, worse still is my bro made me so pissed off , we shopping, he was bored then keep pulling our bag and stepping our shoes. i can't stand it and yell at him. holy shit. then only buy accessories cause other than that, nothing interest me. then went makan at kopitiam, went edge see, but almost all the shop closing cause 9+ already. so decided to take cab home, then very long queue so i came up with this idea, and told my mum we walk in front in front to hail cab. worse happened is no cab to hail, all either busy or they just bloody won't stop for you because they think the road cannot stop? like wth is like is 10+ and we were like walk until we don't even know where we are. then mum was very pissed off and walk back take mrt. then my sis and bro started to blame me for that brilliant idea, fine i keep quiet although i was really pissed deep down but forget. mrted till sk then took cab back, reach home 12 again was very tired larx shower then awhile off to sleep.


x country! at 7:12 PM

well today had cross country. its was tiring ! at first was thinking not to run but then this is the last year so decided to run and ended up making sy and apple angry because we promise them we won't be running but ended up BOO! sorry girls !this year not bad larx, i got 80+ ranking better than the past few years. hahas but then while running half, sudden pain occur in my stomach and i nearly vomit out. the pain was a killer, nearly faint luckily peixin was beside me to hold on to me, or else can't imagine. try to run but the moment i run, the feeling of going to vomit just sudden gush up my throat and i had to stop running but then its like ending soon, so i just hack it and continue to run.after that i tried to take some slip of water and rest awhile, feeling better. after that sat under the sun for like 1hour plus? and i got sunburn ! damn it, anyway i got abit black which is a good thing. :] then later ended, we walked quickly out cause we knew that everyone will hail cab due to too many people taking bus back. then its like so many cabs were busy when we just walk out, so jasmine run to the other side of and hail two cabs. then we just board it and went jalan kayu eat prata all those. they came my house for awhile because we 2.30 going back to see O's result, reached there 3 and mr leong still having his LONG speech. almost all my seniors done well, they either have 11,13 all those. its like wow !, stress stress for myself! gonna mug super duper hard for the o's. after watching them getting their result, i feel kind of motivated and decided to do super well for o's. afterthat, went cp awhile then went home.co tml ! ): 8am eh ! so early, and maybe having chem tution then going out with mum? i still miss you, today you walked behind me. i don't know why, i'm feeling kind of happy or what? say me dumb, just because of that but seriously just a lil a bit, i will be contented. i still waiting for you, for that special chance again. i really miss you alot ! ): without you, i will never be a whole.


imissyou! at 11:51 PM

I MISS YOU !


fcuk me ! at 9:31 PM

let me vanish from this world in oder to stop the pain of yours. i really had cause too much of pain for you without knowing that and keep making you suffered. stab me hard with a knief.


6 days had passed~ at 8:15 PM

well today i woke up late and of cause i was late for tution too. couldn't concentrate much but still manage to learn something. started the new chapter vectors, quite easy can understand thought still abit confusing. then today tution ended one hour early due to all of us can't concentrate for we are very tired. then stay at jin house, waiting for her to pei me get my other ear done. and while i was waiting, i fell asleep and she webcam it and let sy see. idiot her, then cooked noodle settle lunch then awhile went hgm get my ear done. alright i still feel the pain now, need to go back on the 8th for checking. then walk around and then later trained back reach home 6. use com until now, going to do my work later on. but then i still can't concentrate anything right now, for i still thinking of him. i'm afraid, i will breakdown one day. i don't wanna let people to worry of me because this will made me feel more guilty. the facade face i put up, i'm really tired. i wanna to stay in that dream of mine, never awake. at least i still be able to reminisce those moments we had together. i really can't put down this relationship, as each day passed, i'm missing you more and more. every night, i could feel my heartache, those indescribable feeling making me sleepless night. i only wish for that one last chance, let me have the chance to mend it back the suffered i made. i knew you had bear everything for a long period but i really would change for the sake of you. just that can't i really be that special person again? you told me life have to go on,but i don't think i can. i know everyone had told me so, i would like to but i can't. i really can't, i had tried to but i really can't. perhaps just let me be the one to remain on the spot and you move on, i rather be like that. maybe by doing that i would not feel so sad or whatever bahx, but i'm sure from that day onward, i'm no longer that girl that could smile so easy for now every thing is just only a moment of facade. i will wait for you for you are the only that i truly love. i wish to be yours again. and please takecare of yourself, i know you are still feeling unwell, i really wanted to takecare of you but now i can't. so i only can tell you to take care of yourself.

Saturday
i know its been a long time since i last updated, as you can see i'm pretty busy since the start of school and everything isn't going well too. went out with girlsfwen today, my leg is breaking soon. can you imagine we walked non stop from 11+ until my parent come fetch me. guess what, they are not going home but yet going chinatown. man i was like oh gosh? i'm dying larx. went far east, marina square and bugis, my new year to do list almost all done. this year quite feminine, perhaps its i'm going 16 or whatever stuff that change my mind set ? then we had our dinner at ajitei, not bad larx, but we were like so dui lian at there larx. =s made so much of noises. well, i seriously can't get over it althought today its the 5th day since we parted. the places i went like marina and bugis, its kept remind me the past i with him. all the funs, joy we had, it all gonna be a memories. its really sad, those places, everywhere i walk pass, i could simply remember every moment we had. i nearly cried ytd when i was at marina but at least i manage to hold my tears. anyway this is the first time i hate shopping so much cause my leg is hurting so much and i reach home at 12 mid night! its like crazy? i go out for whole day, somemore still got tution the next day.